Gym and stuff

Lame. So it has become apparent to me that quite a few guys in optom also do gym which makes me a sad panda. Not because of some screwed up 'I want to be the only one' kinda thing, which is stupid, but it seems like I haven't really gotten anywhere after a year. In fact I reached 70 then went backwards. Hovering around 69/68 again. This stagnation is pretty off putting.

The kind of things I do. Man I'm such an image obsessed bitch. I can tell this when I look at the back of other guy's arms and wish my arms were larger. Looking at other guys' backs and wishing my back was larger or vshaped or something. Or just wishing my face was better. Or rather just my lower jaw and fishlips haha. I totally blame stacking it in kindy and landing it on my chin.

The above ramblings look like a typical chick's QQ. This is my prerogative as a gay guy. Hm, writing that still seems funny.

Humhum. Luke Yong is hot. But undeniably straight probs. I need to work on a gaydar. . . QQ

Now I'm just forcing myself to write things in an effort to not read optics. Silly.

Seems as though I don't really have anything to look forward to. I guess Friday basketball wouldn't be bad. What else is good. End of semester (which only just started). Pretty tragic.

I start work this saturday. My manager sounds like a douche. Over the phone he was like 'is that cooool?' in some condescending kinda way. I guess he's not too happy to get me since I only just started or something. Or maybe because I wasn't talking too professionally. Whatever. Sucks to be him. The pay is $18 an hour but I'm hoping that's before the Saturday casual pay thing. Otherwise that'll be a ball killer. It's from 9-5 too wtfuck. I'm pretty sure Anthony doesn't work that much. Good thing is I get paid I guess. Don't have to be a leech any more. Seems as though I'll have to stop procrastinating once the work kicks in though. Oh no zo.

In regards to opening up this blog to more people, I'm starting to see more badness that could come out of it. Say I do write my QQ here and only some people read it, how are they supposed to respond? Do I expect them to respond or will they only be reading it for their own enjoyment? Doesn't that defeat the purpose of only letting people I consider close to read this? Then again how are they supposed to bring up the topic if I write something here that's really killing me and I need to talk to someone about. Seems as though these things would be better said straight to another person, but I'm pretty incapable of that. Maybe this blog can be a stepping stone towards something like that.

Now that I think about it, last year was actually pretty huge for me in terms of coming out. Lol. Maybe I should post about that later. It can be one of those typical gayblog posts. Whatever.

I'll read some more optics.